Can You Spot Your True Relationships?

Have You Fallen For The Oldest Trick In The Book?

A Lack Of Self Love.

Relationships are our main vehicle, and the way in which we navigate this human experience. How we relate and interact with others. All relationships including family, friends, colleagues, neighbours, the strangers we pass on the street, and last but not least, our romantic ones.

So right off the bat, I'm going to say we all pursue each of these relationships desiring to fulfil a need we have, a need to be loved, appreciated, to feel worthy, and to define our sense of self. Why? because we don't love or appreciate ourselves, we don't feel worthy, and we have no idea who we are, or what defines us outside of these relationships.

We have been conditioned to operate within low return relationships, and we do it unconsciously. And in the worst cases the toxicity within these relationships will drive some to the depths of despair.

We over give, self sacrifice, and drive ourselves in to low energy pits. And if you are in any kind of relationship dynamic where the other continues to take, and will blame and shame you if you do not keep on giving and self sacrificing, then you will continue on a downward spiral until you became consciously aware of these unconscious patterns and false programs that are running on your hard drive.

False Programs.

Yes they are exactly that, programs, thought and belief systems passed down from generation after generation, and in the main conditioned within us from the society we were born in to. Therefore we have a ton of disempowered individuals on this planet searching high and low for love and self worth, and becoming mightily pissed off with themselves and life because they can't find it, constantly looking out saying "but the other person is the problem" and so we come up with a ton of ways in which others have hurt us, not given us what we need, not appreciated us, not respected us, and of course where they have made us feel sad, angry, depressed, shameful, betrayed and on.

But on the flip side of that. Someone with next to no relationships, will arrive at the same place. Feeling unloved, unworthy, lonely, no one appreciates me, respects me. Who am I, and what's the point if I'm not connecting and communicating with others. And so they too will feel angry, depressed, shameful, pitiful, and on and on. "No one loves me, poor me".

The Illusion.

So hang on a minute, is that not a clue? Think about it for a second. Could it be that YOU yourself do not have a healthy relationship with yourself, therefore every relationship or even if you have little or no relationships outside of you, they are in fact mirroring back to you a reflection of yourself?

Well I'm going to tell you that is exactly what is happening. Could every single person outside of you actually be a gift? Could we have got it all wrong, and the reason for relationships and the fact that they are in the main, the way we navigate this human experience, could they all be the greatest acts of love we have ever experienced? Do they in fact through the discomfort of how they make us feel, show us exactly where we are not loving, respecting, and appreciating ourselves?

Could this be a whole new ball game? NO, its the way its always been, and always will be. We have just been unconscious to it for a very long time. Why? Because we were falsely conditioned, keeping us feeling disempowered.

What If?

So what if we practiced this conscious awareness and evaluated every interaction with another? What if we recognised all the places we put another before self, at detriment to self? Recognised over giving, self sacrifice, self sabotage, and its easy to recognise it, because it doesn't feel good. It creates all the lower spectrum emotions within us. What if we then started to set boundaries with others, speak our truth, openly say "hey this isn't working for me, so I choose something different"? Could our own level of self love, self respect and self worth increase? Could we turn the lower spectrum of emotions in to the higher spectrum of emotions and start to feel empowered? Could we experience more love, joy, harmony, balance, and peace? Could YOU?

What if we let go of all our anger and resentment at another, our pain and suffering because they treated us "badly" and I totally recognise and accept there are some cases of abuse, mental, emotional, and physical. We only have to look at the global stage to see the horrific acts one will inflict on another. But could the level of discomfort you experience be in direct relation to the level of love, respect and appreciation you have for yourself? Because there is only YOU who is accepting in to your reality any other that does not treat you in the highest and greatest way. It is YOU who feels unlovable, unworthy, and less than, therefore you convince yourself using every excuse in the book as to why you are a victim and the other is the villain. It is you who convinces yourself that you have to remain in these relationships using every excuse in the book. But they are family, these are the rules, oh but its my wife, my husband, they are my kids, I work with these people... and oh but how else will I get love, and self worth, or know who I am if I disrupt the status quo in my life and address all of my relationships?

I don't know about you, but that makes for a whole load of people feeling like they have no control over their lives, like they are just dodging life's bullets, just sucking it up and putting up. Playing in to the old chestnut of 'these are the cards I've been dealt, I'm stuck with them'.

It's All About You.

Truth, every single human is love, loved, worthy, and appreciated. Every single human is empowered and has the power to choose and consciously create the life they actually want to experience. And it all starts with self love. You have to love YOU the hardest, you have to be willing to look at your own thoughts and belief systems, and be willing to navigate them by feeling and using your emotions to discern between what is in your best interest, and what is not. You have to fill your own cup, or you will pour out on to others until you are empty and sitting on the non-vibrational floor.

Emotion is energy in motion, they are vibrations, they are your compass and guide, they will show you everywhere you are out of alignment with that 'love' which you already are. And when you realise your own love and self worth, you'll wonder why you ever tried to search outside of yourself for it in the first place. We live in a world of energy, vibration, and frequency. And its also a hall of mirrors. Just think about that, how empowered do you feel knowing that your outside mirror is the greatest act of love ever, and you can consciously use it to navigate your way to the most amazing life you could possibly dream up. What if that 'other' you perceived to hurt you, actually loved you more than you know, so much so, that they would mirror to you the place within you where you have settled for less than you deserve.

Test It.

Don't take my word for it, try it for yourself. Take any of your relationships and pick out anywhere that you perceive another to have a trait or behaviour that makes you feel an unwanted emotion. Then switch it round from "why are they doing this to me' to asking 'where am I doing that to myself, or what part of me feels unworthy and is accepting less than I deserve?' Then identify YOUR course of action, whether that be a new thought, belief, boundary, choosing to walk away from the relationship, or simply providing to yourself that which you perceive to be lacking, or where you have neglected a part of yourself. And watch that perceived trait or behaviour in the other start to dissolve. You will realise it was never really them, but you all along.

Because each of us are 100% responsible for our energy, our choices, our health, our finances, our living arrangements, our work, our state of mind, our emotions, our physical bodies, and for creating the very life we choose to experience. Its just a matter of whether YOU are willing to take that level of power back, and that level of responsibility for your life.

Like Attracts Like.

This has always been the law of the universe, energy, vibration, and frequency trumps all, always did, always will. And each of us are navigating our way back to our natural frequency, each of us with a unique frequency, presented with the exact hall of mirrors in our realties to guide us back to our innate selves. The innate authentic self is one of love, joy, peace, harmony and balance. Plugged back in to our natural frequency, we are happy, healthy, and abundant. And like attracts like. We really do attract what we are in vibrational alignment with.

Relationships will always be the way we navigate our human experience. They make up the bulk of our lives. And its up to you to spot your fake relationships, the relationships that teach, and its up to you to take your power back and choose your way forward. Its up to you to let go when its time to let go, change them when they need changing, commit to them when they need commitment, and its up to you to raise your own vibration and align with the relationships that resonate with your authentic self.

We are in a recalibration period right now, a universal reset, a cosmic reshuffling. The words I use to describe it are irrelevant, but they do not negate from the fact that we are evolving, we are awakening from the deep subconscious sleep, each of us ascending in frequency to return to our innate selves. This is humanities evolution in progress, right here and right now. And whether you are aware or unaware as yet, it is in motion.

And I don't know about you, but logic will tell you that a world full of humans, being their innate authentic selves, that of love, joy, peace, harmony and balance will make for a very different world to the one you see right now. Authentic connection and communication will bring forth a sharing and caring world. Relationships that are in equal balance. Relationships that are liberating, empowering, and high vibrational. Each waters the other, therefore both grow.

And so it all starts with YOU. And you loving YOU first and foremost. When you are the change, you will see it in your world, and in your relationships. Filling your own cup up, and keeping it filled up, means there is never any shortage of energy to pour on to another. Now multiply that by 7 billion on this planet and just imagine. Because right now everyone is wanting and waiting for the outside mirror to change, all blind to the fact that they are merely staring in to the face of themselves.

At least until you see you, you remember you, and then you be you.

With Love

Julie